Skye's Blog

scared.

skyesayshi — Mon, 08 Feb 2010 13:39:06 +0000

somehow between saturday and today, i have gone from having a slightly sore throat to full on flu.
i couldn’t sleep last night- i felt sick, i could barely swallow, my whole head ached, and it wasn’t until i threw up several times from all of that that i got about an hours sleep… at 6.30am.

all i keep thinking is, relapse.

i am terrified.

please, please, don’t let this virus beat me. things were going so well.

this week

skyesayshi — Thu, 28 Jan 2010 19:20:38 +0000

up until today, i have had a very good week.
things are looking up.

today i am over-tired, and feeling very beat, but when i take into account how much i have achieved lately, i am in shock.

the biggest achievement, by far, is j and i booking our holiday for the summer.
i am absolutely petrified, but so so excited.
it is going to be one hell of a test, but i am finally starting to feel like i have a life again. like i can plan again. like not every single day revolves around whether i can walk, or when i need to nap.

this is for the bad days, though they may be less frequent, to remind me how much things have improved. think of the difference since this time last year.

think of this time next year.

bad night

skyesayshi — Wed, 20 Jan 2010 10:58:33 +0000

i don’t even know what to say.
i have had about 2-3 hours sleep.
i’m not quite sure how i am even sat up working, but i give it a few hours.

i am gonna pay big time for this.

this week isn’t going well. everything is just taking its toll. i hate it.

not to sound soppy…

skyesayshi — Fri, 15 Jan 2010 20:42:53 +0000

but thank you.
i have never even met you, and don’t want to push the socially acceptable cyber-boundaries…

but i really see you as a friend. and am grateful to know you.

thank you for helping me through this.

doctors update

skyesayshi — Fri, 15 Jan 2010 19:20:19 +0000

my first visit to the doctors yesterday since i have been gluten free.
i am having more blood tests next week just to see how/if anything has changed since taking the gluten away.
in terms of what happens next… the doctor thinks i should just keep going! he said if it seems to be helping, why change it. fair enough.

he also revealed that his wife and daughter are both coeliacs; which in retrospect explains how he knows SO much about what it is and how it all works etc.
plus he gave me a huge list of where is good for food, right down to the best countries to visit on holidays!
it made me feel so much better, it really helps having that support, especially when a lot of people assume that it’s as simple as “i’ve stopped eating gluten…i’m better”. i really hope i’m heading that way though.

january

skyesayshi — Wed, 06 Jan 2010 16:30:50 +0000

christmas eve

skyesayshi — Thu, 24 Dec 2009 09:53:32 +0000

and i am so ill.

within the 5 days that i have been at home, i have had nowhere near enough sleep, been stressed out by family and now have a migraine/sore throat which feels like it could turn into a cold.

my 3rd christmas since having m.e.
i really thought i was getting somewhere, i’m still hoping that i am.

2 months

skyesayshi — Tue, 15 Dec 2009 17:40:33 +0000

and 2 days.
gosh that time has gone so quickly!!

so the coeliac life… i cannot deny it has helped. i miss bread like hell. but i can walk for about 15 minutes now before it gets too much.
that is an improvement, yay.

however, i woke up this morning at 3am, and was up until 5.30am.
i had to make a hot water bottle to ease the pain in my legs, but it didn’t help.
pants.

i think in the new year…at some point, i am going to re-introduce gluten for 2 weeks…i am scared.
but i cannot live without knowing.

1,2,3, breathe

skyesayshi — Wed, 09 Dec 2009 19:57:08 +0000

everything is going wrong today.
i am trying to keep on top of it.

could do with a break from everything… but i don’t mean that, because everything is essentially okay.

just half an hour maybe? to recollect my calm.

what’s the best way to do this?!

i can’t write essays

skyesayshi — Mon, 30 Nov 2009 16:12:21 +0000

and it is stressing me out.

less stress please, i need to get better.